Dear Margot: Am I Wasting Time?

Dear Margot, 

“I stay up late just to text him, but he never does the same for me. Am I the only one who cares this much, or am I just wasting my time losing sleep over him?”

 I don’t know much about him but what I am getting from this is that you aren’t feeling so reassured. If he is dry with you daily and hasn’t changed then maybe it’s time to talk to him and see why he has been so dry. I don’t want to immediately say that you two should stop texting, but you guys should just have a nice conversation to see how both of you feel. Don’t pressure him into telling you anything either, instead you should make him feel comfortable with small talk and asking him simple questions like, “Are you okay?” “What's on your mind?” and try to read his body language. Trying to understand another person's feelings will help you so much more with conversations. 

It might also be because it’s late he is tired and doesn’t have enough energy to text back. I personally do that a lot with the friends I'm texting, but I reassure them whenever I can though. Talk to him and wait a while, if you haven’t noticed any changes in his behaviour then he isn’t putting in effort to text you. If he stays up late to text his friends then that’s a whole different story. You need to talk to him though and get a rough estimate of how he is feeling and tell him how you feel about it. Make sure your point is made and he gets what you’re saying. Show him that you care about his feelings and you want to know why he’s being dry.

But he might just show his love in a different way too, we all don’t necessarily show we care in the same way. One of you might have more energy than the other, but once you guys are together for a long time then you will both get used to each other's feelings and match each other's personalities. People don’t always click together immediately, it takes time to know someone and how they actually are. 

Try not to overthink the situation and instead take some time to think about the positive side of things. Nothing bad will happen when exchanging your thoughts and feelings. But if something bad does happen then he really isn’t the one to be with, if he wanted to he would help fix the situation and not leave you. That won’t happen once you guys take the time to be together and have a small conversation about that, his reassurance is all you need to feel better. I hope he respects your wishes and I hope you get the reassurance you need. 

Sincerely,

Margot

Image Courtesy of Pxhere.