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  • Writer's pictureMargot

Dear Margot...My Predicament?

Dear Margot…

I cheated on my boyfriend of two years with his brother. Do I tell him? How do I break the news if I do?

Dear Individual…

The first thing you need to understand is that whether or not you tell him, you are going to have to accept what is coming your way. I think that if anything, the best thing to do is admit what happened, and what he decides to do is the final decision. Keeping the truth from him for too long could end up with an even worse reaction from him, so if you are nervous about what will happen, then it’s best to keep that time very short. I think you should also let his brother know that you will be telling him what happened between you too, if he doesn't already know. However, I do not think that you should break the news immediately with his brother there until he has made it known that he wants to confront his brother about it.

If you choose to tell him at some point, you need to be ready for anything he’s going to say or possibly ask. There might be points where you're tempted to lie or bend the story a bit, but I assure you that you do not want to do that. Make sure you are giving him true information and not making it worse by swaying the truth. Bringing this situation up to him should be done in a private setting where you two have the time and space to talk amongst yourselves. Having other opinions in the air and ears everywhere might make him even more uncomfortable and make the interaction strained.

I recommend that you bring it about gently and genuinely, as it is already bad news for him. If it’s necessary, you should give him as much time as he needs to process the information and allow him to feel the emotions that come after. You never know what he is going to say, so be ready to hear his response if he does choose to respond to you in the moment. Just humbly accept the fact that he will be upset, and what happened, happened. Please be understanding and willing to listen to what he says, and aside from that, I wish you good luck and hope that my advice will aid you in your predicament.

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