On April 28, 2015, a 10-minute EP was released on a secret YouTube channel titled Solace, and the description stated the following lines: “Music from when I hit rock bottom.” Since the release, almost a decade later, people who listened to the entire length of the EP praise these songs as some of the best in his discography and still do today. In one forum post created by user Ocean Suki, they give their opinion on the EP by saying, Solace has to be one of, if not the best portrayal of depression and anxiety in music.” Why did Earl Sweatshirt post this EP, and what does Solace talk about?
On February 24, 1994, Thebe Neruda Kgositsile was born in Chicago, Illinois, to his mother, Cheryl Harris, a law professor in California, and Keorapetse Kgositsile, a South African poet and political activist. In the late 2000s, Thebe made his Myspace account in middle school and started making music under the name “Sly Tendencies.” Then, in 2009, Tyler, the Creator, discovered Thebe through his different mixtapes on Myspace and invited him to the future successful hip-hop group Odd Future. After that, he changed his rap name to Earl Sweatshirt and released his first official album in 2010, named Earl, which was heavily produced by Tyler himself. Earl Sweatshirt had to go on hiatus for two years because he was getting himself in trouble with his friends, and his mother believed it was the right decision to send him away to Samoa. He returned to be part of other projects like a feature on Frank Ocean's album Channel Orange, where he was noticed by other names in the rap community and fans alike.
On August 20, 2013, he released his popular debut album after his stay in Samoa, called Doris, reaching number five on the Billboard 200 but number one on the US rap album section. Little did we know that in the two years after the success of Doris, he would reach the pinnacle of his depression. During those two years, Earl Sweatshirt faced the lowest point in his life: drugs, insomnia, depression, losing friends, and the death of his grandmother. All these themes correlate to the songs on Solace, and these themes were prevalent during the rabbit hole of his depression. The context of the EP is crucial to understanding the mental state Earl Sweatshirt was in and the clinical decline of the success most rappers experience. Now, let's talk about the song itself and how it is considered the most realistic depiction of depression.
Before we even listen to the song, let's understand the most important parts of a song video: the title and the description. Solace is a word that describes comfort in times of grief or worry. Themes like the missing of his dead grandmother might be related to this title, as it shows him trying to find comfort during times of worry, such as her death or grief from experiencing a cynical decline in his mental state. The description of the video saying, “Music when I hit rock bottom and found something,” gives an idea of the plot of this entire ten-minute-long song as a stage in his life where he hit rock bottom. This song is broken up into five parts.
Now, let's talk about the general song. The song starts with eerie and distorted repeated lines of “I’ve been here before,” which later become more understandable as they continue in the verse. This line represents how Earl Sweatshirt sees his situation: “I’ve been here before!” He thinks it's normal because he has been through this emotional distress before, so “What's different?” This key verse will be more explained as we go on later in the song. As this verse ends, the beat changes to a calm type of beat, the kind you might hear on a boat trip or in an old commercial from the 1970s, but the lyrics reveal a deeper and sadder story.
The first actual verse starts with Earl Sweatshirt recounting things he has been doing while dealing with his crippling depression. One of the lyrics states, “I haven’t been eating, I’ve been fading away.” This is a common symptom of depression, showing the level of sadness he's been facing right now in his life, and how deep he is in this process. In the following sentences, Earl references a famous actor from the 1900s, River Phoenix, suggesting that he might have the same fate and “they are gonna mail my ashes to my mother.” River Phoenix was a well-known actor who began his drug abuse cycle at a young age and was later found dead on the sidewalk next to a bar due to drug-inflicted heart failure. Earl relates to River's life because, in his current mental state, he fears a similar outcome if he continues down the path of drug use and requests that his ashes be with his mom. Earl then states that his mind is paranoid, and he will keep an eye on everyone because he cannot trust anyone right now.
The verse ends with him saying, “Try to make some sense of all this stuff in my brain, one foot stuck in a tar pit of my ways.” Earl Sweatshirt ends Part 1 by reflecting on his logic and his concept of what's going on with himself, but he denies the possibility of fixing himself because he thinks it might be futile to change, given how deep he is in. The first part gives us the context and the horror of a man who tries to deny any possibility of fixing himself and his chaotic mindset conflicted with drug use and depression. It’s unsettling because it’s like we’re watching a man kill himself in the song. This depiction of denial is amazing but makes us feel uneasy because it’s lyrically written so well while showing the true, realistic horror of the chaos in Earl Sweatshirt's mindset.
Part 2 starts with an unsettling piano beat; it feels nostalgic, but it’s not. The entire beat provides comfort in discomfort, a weird feeling that haunts me every time I listen to this part. The first lyrics state, like in the intro, how Earl is used to this feeling and is trying to downplay the situation as something he can just fix easily. This downfall in his mental state is no different from the depression he has always had. The verse also references his lack of trust in people from Part 1, and he feels like he has been waging a war with his demons for a long time, which will continue to put him in trouble. It reflects the cycle of abuse and the downfall of a man once respected but who sees no respect in himself. In the last lines, Earl Sweatshirt says, “I'm seein’ my mom soon, I'm faded, I stink.” Earl is self-aware of his actions and tells us that he doesn’t want his mother to see him in this state; he knows he is in a bad situation and can’t get his act together, so he can only plead for her to worry about him.
Part 3 is an instrumental, and there is a shift in the song as it becomes more upbeat, feeling calming and relaxing. In Part 4, the song gets a bit calmer, and we hear Earl’s voice again. After Part 3, Earl, in his final verse for the entire song, talks about his grandmother and other struggles he has been facing in his life. In the first couple of stanzas, Earl talks about how he inherited his grandmother's hand shape and mourns her death every time he notices it; he feels like she is the only person who could understand him and help fix his negative processing, but sadly, she has died. He then discusses his problem with insomnia, stating the line, “I’m supposed to be sleeping, but I’m turning and tossing.” This line references Earl’s lack of sleep due to insomnia. Earl reveals that he doesn’t want to be alone and wants to hang out with a bunch of people. He ends the song's lyrics by saying, “If your soul is intact, let me know,” telling listeners of the song that they are in the same position he was and asking them to help him. Part 5 ends the song with an instrumental outro, featuring synths, claps, and a light bass.
My final thoughts on this song are that it's beautifully written and produced by solely one person. He elaborates on his problems in a way that we can understand and reflect on his situation. His beats are amazing, whether instrumental or accompanying his rapping. It gives a sense of Earl’s mental state during the recording of this song, and for me, it is the best depiction of depression in most or any media.
Image Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.
コメント